6 reasons to complete a half yearly review. Today.

Remember all those epiphanies you had in January ? The moments of clarity where you promised yourself this year would be even better than last year?

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A mid year check in will get you places faster than an airport check in. Any day. Here’s why:

#Proof. It’s been proven if you write  your goals (preferably by hand) and check in to review regularly you are significantly more likely to achieve your objectives. Learn more from this Harvard goal setting analysis.

#Procrastination . A lot of people fall off the wagon because they reprioritise less important actions over goals. Focus on the long term vision rather than short term gain. A review shows you where you’ve lost focus & you’re less inclined to sabotage your success next time.

#Plan. If we don’t have a map we get lost. If we don’t have a plan… we drift along in a direction we have no control over. Having goals is great but if you don’t have a step by step plan to get you there it’s futile.

#Roadblocks. If you had objectives in January but you haven’t achieved them or even started you need to ask yourself why. Perhaps it’s not what you really want? Or the obstacles are bigger than you thought. Are these moveable? What resources – people/ tools can you use to plan a way forward. leaves and window coffee

#Confidence. When you review what you have achieved since January it’ll remind you of what you are capable of and build a plethora of examples of how you can completely nail it when you are fully focused. Confidence builder 101.

#Rewards.  We work best being motivated by rewards and what drives us. When reviewing your achievements so far be sure to acknowledge and reward yourself even if you’re only halfway towards your goal.

Get your 5 minute mid year check in.

Letting go of the H’office dream.

Ahhhh working from the home office. Dreamy. Wake up a little later. Make yourself a flat white. Swan about in your fave leisure wear, munching on your home-made muesli and sitting down at your beautifully adorned desk to write screeds of extremely professional emails, locking down 4 new deals and clearing the to do list by 1130am.

When I worked in the corporate world, my employers were fairly lenient with a ‘WFH’ (working from home) day here and there. I was so thrilled not to be sitting in my cubicle or ‘hot desk’, I twiddled away on the couch/rug/balcony with minimal distractions and was fairly efficient. Unsurprisingly with employers eager to keep workers loyal & the growth in entrepreneurship research shows one in 12 workers (769k) in Australia (ABS 2013) and 169k in New Zealand (NZS 2016) choosing to base themselves down the hallway. However, after 3 years away from a cubicle and working on my own business I’ve decided to pull the pin on living the h’office phenomenon full time.

orange chairSure I get it. WFH is pretty rad. You have flexibility. There’s no nasty commute and there’s plenty of tax benefits.  If you have little ones this can work in well with pick ups/ drop offs and you can easily slink off for an afternoon nana nap where required. And wow! How spotless does the house look whenever you encounter a business problem? However here are several reasons why I think it’s worth ditching your sweats and h’office and getting back to ‘work world‘.

Being social vs lonely. Hot DesksA survey of 250 ‘work-from-home’ workers by McCrindle Research in Australia last year found 58 per cent are craving more social interaction and face-to-face contact. WFH is lonely and while the office dramas can drag us down we underestimate the power of being surrounded by others to push us, share ideas and build our confidence. Find a space to work with like-minded folk where you can interact, network, join group learning sessions and potentially do a better job of of ‘co-lab’ than Justin Bieber on exciting  projects with new colleagues.

Self-discipline. The struggle is real. Respondents from the same survey also admitted to eating more food, spending more on office expenses, being unable to relax at home after work and struggling to muster enough self-motivation to do a decent job. The housework all seemed to take top priority for me all of a sudden when I didn’t have to ‘be’ anywhere. If you’re an Olympic qualified procrastinator your h’office is likely your enemy. Move away & fast.

Professionalism in an ug boot? Honestly how much of a success story do you feel in your slippers? Even when coaching on Skype I know what’s going on under the desk and it makes me feel sloppy. Even when you’re WFH it’s always advised to dress as if you were meeting clients in order to convey to yourself & others you mean business.

Work/life balance. Pffft. leaves and window coffeeFrom the same McCrindle research only 25% of people said the WFH offered better work/ life balance. Remember – you can NEVER escape the h’office. Saturday & Sundays blend into a slippery slope of working hours because you were too busy attending to your herb garden on Monday & the computer’s standby light is beckoning you every time you walk past.

The Buzz. Home & Away omnibus playing in the background does not make up for the atmospheric buzz of people kicking goals and the uplifting energy you can literally feel being surrounded by others. The banter may drop off but the sounds of others getting sh*t done is enough to motivate the snooziest of us.

high shotThe alternatives. Many of my clients are ‘solpreneurs’ and if budget is a little tight they choose to hit up cafes or libraries – though NZ seriously lags Australia on free wifi spots. The only annoyance is the occasional café office hogger loudly completing personal admin on their headset purchasing just two mocha-chinos for a days free rent.

For those of us who don’t have to go into a company office I am a big fan of co-share spaces. I’ve visited many inspiring hubs in Sydney and NZ over the last 3 years & I’m excited to finally commit to a space called The Collect and see how my productivity levels accelerate, network grows and routine falls into place. I believe it will be the best of both worlds but I’m very aware at the end of the day my  determination to have my own successful business will always be the driver to get up motivated everyday whether I’m in an office, h’office or co-share space.IMG_5177 A

Enough from me. The dryer just ‘dinged’ and it’s time to get folding.

Check out some co-share #inspo from around the globe.

Need some motivation? King or queen of procrastination? Sign up to our mailing list and receive your free Kickstarter Guide from The You Project. A quick simple guide to get you focused on what’s important and how to get there.

 

Why habits are the new game changer.

When was the last time you thought about your good habits? powerofhabit It feels like habits get a bad rap because we often think of them negatively as in biting nails or over-eating but they can be huge game changers when you make the effort to turn around those that aren’t working for you.  My inspiration today is from Charles  Duhigg’s book The Power of Habit which throws new light on why we have habits, how they come about and how to change the ones which aren’t working for us.

So why do we have habits? Scientists believe it’s because our brain is always looking for ways to save effort. Remember your first aerobics step class or L plated driving lesson? How exhausting! But after a while your brain learned what to do so much so we often experience auto-pilot  where we wonder where on earth we ‘were’ for a  few minutes. Tests at MIT in the 1990s also showed after learning a habit lab rats had only minimal activity occurring in the rest of their brains compared to the first few attempts of a new routine.

An ancestral part of our brain, the basal ganglia is believed to be responsible for our habit storage. When people’s basal ganglia is damaged they are no longer able to form simple tasks when their access to ‘habit storage’ is unavailable.

The interesting hard cold truth: When a habit emerges the brain stops fully participating in decision making. So unless you find new routines the pattern will automatically unfold. The brain also can’t tell when a habit is good or bad so a bad one can just be lurking waiting to be fired up for a unhelpful reward.

But once you understand the habit loop you can break it down into parts, experiment and find ways to change it up by overpowering the existing neurological pathways with more compelling habits.

The Habit Loop.

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Firstly the cue occurs: A situational trigger that is based on a reward you’re seeking.

Next up the routine: A physical or emotional action you take to obtain the reward.

Finally the reward: The satisfaction you seek by following the routine

The key is to understand what the craving is,  experiment with the rewards and then the routine can be swapped out for something more beneficial.

Before we go into solution mode it is worth observing the mechanism of habits. Habits create strong neurological cravings however because they emerge quite gradually we are often blindsided by their influence.  What’s even more interesting is our brain begins anticipating the reward long before we take action. Marketers and retailers worked this out some time ago hence the likes of Dunkin’ Donuts spraying their scents of hot cinnamon baked goods across mall floors to trigger a potential craving. Or how about foaming shampoo and toothpaste? It doesn’t actually need to foam but product developers discovered consumers feel cleaner from a foam sensation which drives more use  of the product more often to satisfy the clean craving.

One of our biggest cravings is often for distraction. 6a0147e0ba5e57970b017ee83f2f17970dThink about when a text goes off. How hard is it to resist looking at it? The brain has started anticipating the distraction of opening a text before you’ve even looked at it. But if you have your phone on silent  have you noticed how much longer you stay focused on your task at hand for?

So how do we get past an unhelpful habit?  Science has proven if we keep the same cue and same reward, a new routine can be introduced. For example a smoker who has identified their craving is relaxation and the reward is feeling chilled out a new routine of long slow deep breaths during a gentle stroll which activates the parasympathetic nervous system may serve as a good alternative. Or if you want to start running you choose a cue (put your clothes out the night before) and a reward – maybe a smoothie. Cue-Routine-Reward-Running_thumbBut only when you brain starts anticipating the reward – the endorphins or sense of achievement from your quick lap round the park will it become an automatic association for your brain. So you need to keep repeating the action several times to teach your brain you crave that new reward . Another key point is you must choose your own meaningful reward – not what someone else has suggested.

But just having a new routine and reward may not be enough. You need to believe change is possible and studies have shown you are far more likely to succeed if you have an accountability partner or a group of people going through a similar experience to share and commit to change with.

Here’s how to re:set a habit in 4 easy steps.

Step 1. Identify your routine. What is the behaviour you want to change? Working from home I have to admit I do a fair amount of pantry grazing when I’m overloaded and need a breather. My routine is to get up stare longingly into the pantry and wait to find something to satisfy what I believe is a hunger craving.

3Step 2. Experiment with rewards. Get your lab coat out, your notepad and pen & start trialing new rewards. I tried getting out & schimmying round the block. Then meditating. Then having a drink of water. After trying each new reward set an alarm for 15 mins. At that point ask do I still want the original ‘reward’?

Step 3. Isolate the cue. We have so much information bombarding us all the time it’s hard to know what exactly is triggering us. Answer these questions every time your habit is triggered to identify what is causing you to choose this habit over something more beneficial.

  • Where am I?
  • What time is it?
  • How am I feeling?
  • Who else is around?
  • What action preceded the urge?

Step 4. Have a plan. Remember that a habit is a choice that we deliberately made at one point, we then stopped thinking about it but continued to do every day. So start by making conscious decisions with a plan to do the new action. When I feel an urge to hit up the pantry I have a plan now to go for a walk and get some fresh air mid morning and mid afternoon when my craving for distraction seems to be at it’s highest. You might also want to find an accountability partner or group of people to help support your plan and discover the game changing nature of habit refinement.

Want more? Check out this nifty infographic from Duhigg on habits

 

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Starting 2017 with a BANG & a PLAN.

Whether we are cruising along nicely or feel like we’ve been foot-tripped and skidding sideways precariously towards 31st of December, there’s no denying 2016’s days are numbered.

I’ve always been curious as to why the 31st of December feels like a virtual finish line and 1st of January an invisible start line. But if like most of us you adhere to this, the end of the year break does make for an excellent time to review, reset, regroup and renew.

Speaking at a recent event in New Zealand last week, many people fed back they simply wanted more time to catch their breath, relax and not feel guilty about it in 2017. Other clients have said they want to reprioritise their health specifically around better eating habits, find new interests outside of work, less time on social media and make a conscious effort to extend their social circles. What’s on your agenda?

This kick off with a bang and a plan for ’17 will take fifteen minutes max but an hour is ideal. It’s very painless – in actual fact quite pleasant. And rocks a lot harder than any New Years resolutions you will make for one night and keep for about 10 days. Grab your paper and pen and answer the qs below.

# 1: Yes, I did that. CELEBRATE 2016.

  • What was absolutely awesome?
  • What did you learn? There is no failure only feedback.
  • Who are you grateful for? (Let them know!)
  • What will you take with you into 2017? A learning or success perhaps.

#2: Time to move on. LETTING GO.

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  • What are you willing to let go of? If you only answer one question answer this. So many of us avoid it but it’s fundamental if you want to grow. Is there a project that’s been on the to do list for years that isn’t happening? An event which you’re cursing yourself about? An emotion which is holding you back? A person who isn’t positively influencing your life and bringing you down? Have the conversations you need to and MOVE ON.

“Be like a tree and let the dead leaves drop” Rumi. 

#3: Here’s what I want to happen and why. ACTION STATIONS.

  • Name 5 things you want to commence, change or complete. And if not now, when? They can be habits, goals, a review of your personal brand ‘story’ or even a sabotage clean out.
  • Zones to consider: career, relationships, adventure, personal development, health, education.
  • For each game changing action list at least three reasons WHY you want it to happen. Without VERY good reasons you’ll find it ends up on your ‘did not complete’ list.

#4: I must I must I must keep going. MAINTENANCE & MOTIVATION

  • What will you read/ learn more about to propel you forward?
  • When does your plan start? We all know what “Next Monday” means. Commit to a date.
  • How often will you review your plan?
  • Who is on your team for 2017 to help make everything happen ?
  • When you lack motivation what/ who/ how will you get your momentum back? Have a reset strategy.
  • Share your plans with at least one close buddy who is good at holding you accountable. AKA your accountabilibuddy.
  • Visualize it. One of the strongest ways to make it all happen is to visualize yourself enjoying your success this time next year. Email me if you need some visualization resources.

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That’s it. Easy as. Enjoy your holidays and here’s to a fantastic 2017. Now to go make it happen.

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What happens in a coaching session?

No one really writes about this. And this is why. The best coaching session is dynamic and malleable because every client has a different perspective, challenge or opportunity to discuss each time. It doesn’t follow a step by step formula like in other professional services. However if you’ve never had a coaching session here’s a basic synopsis for perhaps a first time client.

  • You meet with your coach in a location where you feel comfortable to speak openly and after a brief intro you’ll discuss the specific area of your life where you are challenged at the moment. It’s here you’ll decide with your coach the desired outcome for the session and quite often it’s not the original challenge you thought. Coaching can be done in person but nowadays it’s just as common to speak with your coach on the phone or over Skype. My coach is in New York!
  • You then begin a coaching conversation where the coach listens as you explain the situation. A good coach won’t get involved in the story. Rather they are listening for beliefs, comments, patterns, body language and may stop you mid-story if they feel they already understand enough.Coaching-conversation
  • A trained performance coach will ask smart insight-giving questions. As mentioned in my previous blog on What is coaching, it is not about advice. It’s about asking the questions to get you to think outside of what you are currently able to ‘see’. While a coach will provide a safe, trusting environment they are not your friend so they are able to challenge you in a way in which perhaps family or friends would not.
  • These questions will bring about realisations in terms of your current situation and where you might be holding yourself back. As you are in a trusted space without judgement you are free to express where you are having difficulties.
  • It’s at this time your coach may prompt you to start thinking of opportunities or solutions you hadn’t imagined before. Once you’ve tabled these you can decide on which option is most viable given where you want to get to.
  • Next up is setting a plan. This is not just about setting some SMART goals and setting sail for Tahiti with a mojito in hand.  TahitiYour coach will hold you accountable to what you’ve committed to. And yes, we all get busy and have reasons for not completing our tasks but it’s amazing when you know you have someone to report back to (who you’ve invested to keep you on track) how much more likely you are to complete what you committed to.
  • Finally you’ll finish up with a brief summary of your session and a check in on how you now feel about your situation at hand. Together you will set some targets and there may be some extra reading or work to complete before you met again.

This is a super basic format however every coaching session is different. Coaches have many models and techniques to use so you should never feel like it’s the same old routine every time.

Sometimes it might be quite goal oriented while other times you may explore a behaviour or belief for example a lack of self-confidence or your procrastination habits, then find ways of shifting your mindset to change your outcomes.

Of course to really know what a coaching session is like you need to experience it for yourself. Reach out if you’re interested in finding out more.

 

Can you high five yourself?

When the All Blacks win the next rugby world cup  the Kiwis will have no problem celebrating.  When your friend, colleague, child or even pet has a success you have no issue applauding.  But giving ourselves a high five when we make it to a milestone & shouting “Good on me” from the rooftops? It seems to feel a little squeamish.

As The You Project turns one this week and LinkedIn’s constant alerts signal more excitement about the anniversary than me I questioned why is it that I felt so uncomfortable celebrating.  Particularly outwardly. Down-under we like to think we have a ‘Tall Poppy Syndrome’  criticising any sign of a self-promoter however Tony Robbins who has worked with millions of people worldwide assures us we are not that special, this is a worldwide phenomenon –  we just have a good name for it.

Most of us were brought up not to brag about achievements and those kids that did were certainly frowned on. But why do we accept someone being proud of their achievement as bad?   Is it possible to re-frame our beliefs around this in order for us to display pride more freely?

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One of the most common barriers to acknowledging success is worrying about what people will think. But as Marie Forleo reminded clients in a recent vlog there are always going to be people who judge you. Key question:  Who are you living your life for? Are you trying to live your whole life not judged by anyone? Because we know that is actually not possible and attempting it is going to be very unfulfilling.  Draw a line in the sand & leave the naysayers who judge where they are – they’re not likely to be crucial to your success anyway.

Setting very high standards and the ‘I’m not enough’ syndrome also hold us back from celebrating success. “Once I have reached 1,000 clients or when I get the promotion then I’ll celebrate”. But this is a moving goal post. If you work like this, there will always be another goal to achieve and you’ll also miss out on the awesome dopamine which comes from acknowledging an awesome outcome.

How to say “good on ya” and reap the rewards:

  • Enjoying your success builds confidence, self-worth and creates a positive energy around you which people find infectious and want to get on board with.
  • Acknowledging your achievement inwardly by meditating, journalling or pondering as you exercise recalling HOW you got to where you are today. The lessons, the wins and the challenges you overcame along the way.
  • It’s not ALL about you.  Celebrate your achievements with those key players who helped you get there & spread the good vibes by asking them what they have done lately they are proud of?
  • Celebrating doesn’t have to be a big night on the ‘turps’ or a $500 day spa package. Come up with a list of small treats, activities or moments.
  • YOU are the key pillar to the success in your life. If you can’t say good job to yourself why should anyone else?

The YOU Project is still very much in its infancy. No bids for takeovers just yet. It’s been an exhilarating roller coaster ride of self-discovery, intensive networking and dealing with an HR manager, marketing and finance departments with different agendas has had it’s moments. However while there is so much still to accomplish I have made it to a year.  Every day I still feel so excited to work with my awesome clients and help move them to more fulfilling places. I get to learn and develop new inspiring content, create workshops and have some awesome projects in the pipeline.  A massive part of my year has also been reaffirming what incredible support I have from my network of mentors, clients, family & friends which has given me so many rewarding opportunities.

So I’m going to toot my horn this week. Toot toot.  I’m proud The YOU Project has turned one. I’m not worried if people judge me for feeling a bit of goodness. That is their choice. I’m walking the walk of what I spend my days encouraging my clients to do – take a moment to go “Yes, actually Bec, good work, keep it up”.

So what latest achievement are you proud of? Your task for this week is ASK 3 people what they are most proud of at the moment then share yours – a little self promo never hurt anyone. I want to hear about it!

2Finally, a massive thank you to all the awesome clients, mentors, family and friends who have been so incredibly supportive to me these past twelve months. I look forward to celebrating with you all soon.

Time for a 15 min mid-year check in with YOU?

I’m a straight shooter. And I’m not afraid to point out the glaringly obvious. It’s 1 July today. We’re half way through 2015. Around about now you start procrastinating about tax or filling in your automated yet clunky KPI Internal Comms system ‘demonstrating’ what a terrific year you’ve had so far for your manager to rush through to meet internal deadlines.  But here’s something outrageous. How about putting some time aside to actually reflect on your year so far?

Here’s some key questions to kick start your own personal mid-year review.

  1. Source your goals, be they in your head or on paper. How are you tracking? What have been your wins? Where do you need to focus your efforts to keep winning? What has slowed you down & how will you look to solve these challenges?
  2. Your approach. Rather than being attached to a set outcome as you begin each action, consider your strategic approach for each goal especially around who you are being. Do you need to adjust your openness to improve a relationship? Can you find more joy in the everyday, seemingly mundane things?
  3. Your support crew. Who are you going to recruit/ keep on board to assist you to make the rest of 2015 a stellar year? Equally who will you offer support and advice to you – remembering contribution is a key attribute to achieving greater happiness in your life.
  4. Imagine it’s the Christmas party season of 2015. You’re making the rounds. When people ask you how your year was what do you tell them? Make a list with all the areas important to you e.g happiness, health, fitness, love, career, finance, relationships, travel, family, hobbies, home, etc
  5.  What are three actions you will commit to completing this week to get you on your way to achieving your big ticket items and small every day wins?  Email them to a trusted friend who will hold you accountable or feel free to send them my way.

Ideally set aside 1-2 hours to reflect, refocus and refresh your outlook for 2015 but if you can only find 15 minutes just do it! You’re well ahead of the game already by even reading this.

I have a few places left at my women’s workshop The Direction Momentum in Bondi on 12th of July. A great opportunity if you or anyone you know is drifting along or needs some motivation!

mtnsI noted recently how many metaphors and language there is around focus and goal setting with roads and travelling. Journeys, direction,  path, momentum, wheels in mud, road map, stuck at a fork in the road, the road less travelled, crossroads, life intersections the list goes on. So I thought the image I took en route to Mt Hutt , Canterbury, N.Z. on Saturday was apt for today’s blog.

Where’s the road taking you for the rest of 2015?

Get motivated. And stay motivated.

If I had a $1 for every time I’ve seen “New year, new you” in the last couple of weeks I’d at least be up $85.  The media however is simply riding off the annual ‘resolution frenzy’ as we recover from our seasonal holidays, reflect on the year just gone and make promises to ourselves and our loved ones about what will happen in 2015.

And now it’s the first week of February. Some of you may already be knee deep in your goals, many may refuse to make any while others made grand resolutions but well, it’s still summer… the beach is calling.

I’ve already written about goal setting and procrastination however what is key at this point is actually motivation. You can write as many goals, make resolutions,  design vision boards and review last year till the cows come home but if you don’t take ‘massive action’ as Tony Robbins discusses – your chances of achieving your goals are slim to none.

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So how do we get motivated and more importantly stay motivated to take action?

Clear the space. Give yourself at least a half day in a clutter and distraction free zone and get those goals down written down. Paper, whiteboard, mobile, diary, laptop – whatever is easily accessible so you can read them daily and review your progress weekly.  When you write them down you are declaring your intention to yourself and putting the wheels in motion.  Ensure they are not just gliding over from one year into another. Get real with yourself about why you didn’t achieve them – were you realistic or are they no longer important to you? Vocabulary is also essential – the words we use around a goal influence how we committed we feel about achieving the goal.

Have a plan. Were your goals conjured up with a massive hangover on New Years Day with not a strategy in sight?  The best way to stay motivated is to have a simple plan breaking your goals into smaller manageable action steps. Keep it simple with five to seven goals at one time. This will prevent you from going into ‘overwhelm and mass abandonment mode’. Robin Sharma suggests a quarterly themed focus for example ‘health and well-being’ to allow you to be solely concentrate on one area of your life. While Gretchen Rubin in The Happiness Project has monthly resolution to achieve, for example ‘Boost energy’ or ‘Pursue a passion’.

Visualise it. If you spend time every day visualising achieving your goal research has shown you are far more likely to achieve it than if you didn’t. Simply take 5 minutes as you read your goals daily to visualise yourself having achieved the goal and what it will look and feel like. A vision board is a super helpful tool – contact me for some quick tips to get you started.

Be inspired by others. Who else has done what you’re doing? Research, model and ask questions to people who have done what you’re wanting to do. What do they see as the key to achieving their goals? Join a network of people who will stretch you, watch a TED talk to inspire you, attend a motivational workshop or read book that expands your thinking.

Build yourself a support crew. Gone are the days when we have to go it alone. Look to the experts. Whether it’s a nutritionist to get your wellness back on track, a coach to hold you accountable to your plans, a sponsor within your company to accelerate your growth, build a team who are invested and excited for your success. Refrain from sharing your goal with every man and their dog on Facebook – in fact this TED talk reveals why you shouldn’t over share. Get help from those you respect and are on board for your success.

Get physical. Having great physical and mental health is essential to achieving goals. If you’re slothing about in your trackies and ugg boots vs getting your endorphin’s pumping through a top notch workout how differently do you think your approach to making goal progress might be? Your state is a key factor.

Action stations. Once you’ve reviewed, planned and are inspired here’s the crucial element – take massive action within the next 24 hours to leverage your momentum and passion. And when you encounter speed wobbles take a moment to reflect, get to the core of the obstacle and take appropriate action immediately – knowing that overcoming obstacles is actually what will give you the most satisfaction when the goal is complete.

 Celebrate. When you reach any decent milestone reward yourself – I even have a tiered list of rewards (now that is a fun list to create!). Be sure to share your progress with your support crew, give yourself a big tick or strike through on your ‘to do’ list and leverage the momentum of the feeling of achievement to take your next step of action.

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This week I’ve launched ‘The Motivator‘. A short intensive programme for those who know what their goals are but are having problems making progress.

The nifty fifty days left of 2014.

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I’m in the midst of ‘goal-storming’ for next year and typically when I’m setting goals I do them in 90 day increments. Hey I’m in personal development, I’m allowed to be a massive goal nerd! However it’s been a hectic month so things have got a lil out of control. It lead me to do a quick count of how many days were left of 2014 to achieve my existing goals. Fifty. WHAT! Fifty. Cripes.

And let’s be honest. We may as well take out Christmas Eve day to New Years Eve day. It’s a write off –  wading from panic pressie buying to last minute ham purchases, Christmas pudding to nana naps on the couch,  sun lounger to outdoor pub, from chillaxing (or taming your sprogs) at the beach to drawn out brunches. So that’s 42. Holy moly.

You’ve no doubt heard of the SMART goal acronym. It’s been around the traps since the ’80s and there are a few versions. As a quick refresh:

  • S = specific. Make sure it’s super clear. Think what, why, who, where, which.
  • M = measurable. You need to be able to measure your success. How will you know when you’re there?
  • A = achievable. Say you’re 45. You’re probably not going to be an All Black. Ensure your goal is do-able within your current lifestyle/stage.
  • R = realistic. Specifically what will you need to do/ give up/ change to make this happen. Are you up for it?
  • T = time based. Set your time frame. You need a date to work towards or else it will be the never ending goal that just keeps on extending into never never land.

With a couple of trips back to the homeland between now and 31 Dec, a multitude of different work opportunities and many reasons to celebrate realistically I’m now thinking I have about 20 days of productive days/ evenings/ spare minutes up my sleeve. Yikes!

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Another key rule when writing goals is the 3 P’s. Keep them positive – I’ll weigh vs I hope/ I’ll try/ I wish. Use the present tense – I have a new job vs I’ll be in a new job. And finally make it personal. Keep it motivating, visionary & engaging for you e.g.  On the 31st of December I am proudly standing on the completed shiney new deck I built and enjoying it with my mates.

If you, like me have things you set out to do in 2014 and they are achievable by the 31st of December or even ideas you have for 2015 you can get cracking on now so you’re not on the back foot in January then with 50 days to go now’s the time to get focused.

One final piece to think about from old mate Tony Robbins. Actually achieving these goals will not make you eternally happy. It’s who you become from overcoming all the challenges to get there that gives the real fulfillment factor. He asks “What kind of person will you need to become to achieve all that you want?”. Lofty and big for a Wednesday morning but you get my drift.

So what’s on your ‘to do’ list?

Is it to drop some kgs pre party season, spend more 1-1 time being present with the kids, have ‘me time’ once a week, start researching for a new career, download a meditation app and practice daily, start having green smoothies, stop having so many green smoothies, finishing a home renovation that’s been lingering, start a pilates class, visit a nutritionist to get your health back on track, join bikini boot-camp or the local touch team, limit boozing at agency lunches to prevent early onset of gout (you know who you are!), sign up to learn a new language next year, commit to 4 social media weekend detoxes, spring cleaning the wardrobe & donating the excessive Zara/ ASOS purchases to charity or even finally having ‘that’ chat you’ve been putting off with your manager about promotion possibilities. Whatever it is. Just crack on so on the 31st of December you know you gave the last 50 of twenty fourteen a red hot go.

I’m going to experiment with my 50 day plan. I’ve even (nerd alert) produced a template to get me started and keep me on track. If you’re keen to try a 50 day plan too or have a cheeky squizz shoot me your email and I’ll send my nifty fifty template your way.

Remember. What you focus on is what you get. To the exclusion of everything else.

Happy fifty!

 

The top ten from Tony Robbins. Go on. Unleash.

Now fully committed to the world of self development it felt like a rite of passage to attend  ‘Unleash the Power Within’with Tony Robbins. Coming down from my workshop high here are some of my key take aways on how to lead a fulfilling life according to Tony.

  1. The F word. There are two primary fears all humans share – we fear we’re not good enough and we won’t be loved.  My thought – massive double whammy ouch when someone we love rejects us.
  2. Core without a Swiss ball. We have 6 core needs which drive each of us. The four primal needs are certainty, uncertainty, significance and connection. The two spiritual needs are growth and contribution. The skill lies in finding a sustainable way to fulfill your needs giving you more pleasure than pain. If you have time check out one of his most watched you tubes.
  3. Get your sneaks on.Your physiology is key to change & a Tony seminar means getting over yourself, jumping and dancing like you’re back at a rave circa ‘98. Reason behind it: motion creates emotion. Dancing to 80s & 90s remixes creates positive neural pathways so your clever mind associates positive energy around your new focus.
  4. Who are you? Your identity is formed from a combo of your beliefs and values which we learn from the world around us as we grow up. Beliefs are feelings of absolute certainty. They’re either global beliefs ‘Life is xxx, People are xxx’. Or rules e.g  In order to feel happy I need to have a calorie free gelato every day.  Values are emotional states we believe are important to experience or avoid. E.g. I love snowboarding because it gives me a sense of adventure but if I’m fearing failure you won’t see me attempting a 360 anytime soon.
  5. Yes, I fire walked. And damn, it was cool! Probably the most infamous part of Tony’s seminar is a walk across burning hot coals. Tony fully preps you by changing your state (no not hypnotizing!) so by that the time I saw the coals laying before me  I was so pumped, full of energy from 5000 people cheering & hooting,  I thought I was actually Wonder Woman and stormed across. I’m not gonna lie, you feel pretty empowered afterwards. And the pedicure was still in tact.

wonderw

 

 

 

 

A pity I didn’t have this outfit on hand to walk across the hot coals.

  1. Hold up! We all have awesome useful beliefs and then really dud ones. Your limiting beliefs hold you back from achieving what you really want. Identify those and replace them with resourceful positive beliefs (a coach is very handy here). Why hang onto something that is not helpful? If you want to hear how Tony did it, call me. It was intense but worked.
  2. The past does not equal the future unless you live there. Period.
  3. Find a model. No, not a Victoria Secret model (unless you want to be one). Surrounding yourself with people who already have the results you want rubs off on you, you learn how they are where they are. Replicate it.
  4. Focus = results.I’m a big fan of this. What you focus on is what you feel, receive and deliver so without a clear and compelling vision of what you want and a plan to get you there life will happen at you not for you.
  5. Thank YOU! You can’t be fearful and grateful at the same time.  Taking time each day to be grateful for what you have (as opposed to what is missing) becomes a habit and gratitude is a key connector between humans so it’s a worthwhile investment of time! I’m going to try this for 90 days. I’ll report back.

Ok, so old mate Tony is not for everyone but I don’t think you could go and not get something out of it – I felt it was completely worth my time and money PLUS I have so much content (stand by!). You just have to get over yourself, get outside your comfort zone,  be ready to face some fears and come out on the other side a raver with a new enthusiasm for whats ahead.

“Whatever you hold in your mind on a consistent basis is exactly what you will experience in life” Tony Robbins. tony robbins

If you don’t know who Tony Robbins is, here’s quick bio: Motivational speaker – performed over 30,000 hours of speaking/ coaching and worked around the world with over 3 million people. From this exposure he has an incredible insight into human behaviour and his success rate in creating change for people has given him access to some of the worlds most talented. His energy and enthusiasm for life is incredibly infectious and yes, while he is cross selling and up-selling like no tomorrow, I buy his authenticity for wanting to help people lead more fulfilling lives. He’s worth millions but still trooping around the globe. Not bad for 54 years old I say.